In the last couple weeks since my last post, I've been feeling more "settled" or peaceful.
It's almost as if I've finally come to a place of rest and contentment with where we are at.
I know I cannot control our future, and I have kind of come to a place of acceptance.
Let me explain that a little bit.
In DBT (Dialectal Behavioural Therapy) we are taught that freedom from suffering requires acceptance from deep within of what is. That we need to let go of fighting reality. Pain creates suffering only when we refuse to accept the pain. Accept the pain? That sounds hard, and it is! But acceptance doesn't mean approving, it is rather acknowledging what is, and deciding to tolerate the moment. I practice this radical acceptance through various mindfulness exercises, and through connection with my Father whom I can TRUST.
I am believing more than ever, that my God has a plan that is BIGGER and GREATER than mine. His plan for me is so wonderful that my mind cannot even fathom.
"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways, declares the
For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts."
His plan may not look like mine, it may not include a baby or a family. But I am trusting that whatever is to come, I will be surrounded and comforted by God's deep love. And oh, that is a sweet place to be!
"God—you’re my God!
I can’t get enough of you!
I’ve worked up such hunger and thirst for God,
traveling across dry and weary deserts.
So here I am in the place of worship, eyes open,
drinking in your strength and glory.
In your generous love I am really living at last!
My lips brim praises like fountains.
I bless you every time I take a breath;
My arms wave like banners of praise to you.
God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us"
I love how the message says this verse in Ephesians. He works in us not by pushing us around, but my deeply and gently working within us, through the Spirit!
Here are some things I am thankful for lately:
My beautiful, comfortable home
Fall sunsets in the west and rainbows in the east
Amazing garage sale finds for (hopefully!) a little child of ours one day