How is it even possible I have an (almost) ONE year old?!?!
This has been by far the fastest, and best year of my life!
It honestly feels like just a few months ago we were in the trudges of infertility, fertility treatments and our failed adoption. Sometimes I feel like I “should” stop talking about infertility because everyone is “sick of hearing it” or "think Im just dwelling on our hard past” (stories I make up in my head), but infertility has greatly shaped who I am now as a person, and a mother. An infertile mother.
There have still been plenty of hard moments this year, but the hard never even came close to the hard of the hellish world of infertility.
There was one season when Sunnie wouldn’t let me put her down or leave the room without her scream crying. It was claustrophobic and I felt like I couldn’t get anything done, and I just wanted to be alone. I had my hardest mothering moments during these weeks… but guys, really… I have a BABY that loves me so much she wants to be with me always (I say it again, I have a BABY)!! This isn’t some “rose coloured glasses” or “look on the bright side” kinda thing cause I hate that stuff. This is a genuine perspective thats centred around gratitude that I’ve been gifted because of a REALLY TERRIBLE TIME in my life.
I’m wouldn’t say I’m thankful for our infertility journey; I never want to relive those years (and thats a big factor in whether we want more kids or not… but thats a whole other story!) but I am thankful for the perspective it gave me during this first year as a mother.
Okay I could go on and on and oooon but can I just show you a highlight real of Sunnies first year now?
Great! Here it goes: